Moodsearch

Pattern library

Put a name to what keeps happening.

Explore clear, therapist-reviewed explanations of common patterns in how we think, feel, work, and relate.

141 therapist-reviewed patterns

Rumination & Overthinking Patterns“Why” loopingGetting trapped in trying to explain why something happened, even when no answer will fully satisfy.Read about this pattern →Executive Function PatternsAdmin overwhelmFeeling overwhelmed by small logistical tasks like emails, forms, scheduling, or errands.Read about this pattern →Burnout & Capacity PatternsAll-or-nothing productivitySwinging between doing everything and doing nothing instead of finding a middle pace.Read about this pattern →Cognitive Distortion PatternsAll-or-nothing thinkingSeeing things in extremes, such as total success or total failure, with no middle ground.Read about this pattern →Rumination & Overthinking PatternsAnalysis paralysisGetting stuck thinking through options, meanings, or consequences until action feels impossible.Read about this pattern →Anxiety & Threat PatternsAnticipatory dreadFeeling anxious or depleted in advance of something before it has actually happened.Read about this pattern →Anxiety & Threat PatternsAnxiety-as-evidenceTreating anxiety or discomfort as proof that something is actually wrong.Read about this pattern →Self-Worth & Shame PatternsApproval chasingAdjusting your behavior to earn praise, reassurance, attention, or acceptance.Read about this pattern →People-Pleasing & Overfunctioning PatternsApproval shape-shiftingChanging your opinions, personality, needs, or presentation to be liked or accepted.Read about this pattern →Self-Worth & Shame PatternsBelonging doubtQuestioning whether you really belong, are wanted, or have a place with others.Read about this pattern →Burnout & Capacity PatternsBoom-bust cyclingAlternating between intense effort and collapse instead of working at a sustainable pace.Read about this pattern →People-Pleasing & Overfunctioning PatternsBoundary avoidanceAvoiding limits because saying no feels selfish, dangerous, or guilt-inducing.Read about this pattern →People-Pleasing & Overfunctioning PatternsBoundary guiltFeeling guilty, mean, or selfish after expressing a limit.Read about this pattern →Burnout & Capacity PatternsBurnout denialMinimizing depletion and continuing as if you should be able to function normally.Read about this pattern →Attachment Anxiety PatternsCare testingCreating small tests or situations to see if someone will notice, choose you, or reassure you.Read about this pattern →Anxiety & Threat PatternsCatastrophizingJumping to the worst possible outcome and treating it as likely or inevitable.Read about this pattern →Anxiety & Threat PatternsChronic worryRepeatedly thinking through possible future problems in an attempt to feel prepared, but rarely reaching real relief.Read about this pattern →Attachment Anxiety PatternsCloseness checkingLooking for signs that the bond is still secure through contact, affection, attention, or responsiveness.Read about this pattern →Rumination & Overthinking PatternsClosure chasingTrying to keep analyzing, asking, or revisiting something until it finally feels emotionally settled.Read about this pattern →Rumination & Overthinking PatternsCo-ruminationBonding with others by repeatedly discussing problems without moving toward relief or solutions.Read about this pattern →Avoidance & Escape PatternsConflict avoidanceAvoiding disagreement or tension even when something needs to be addressed.Read about this pattern →Relationship Conflict PatternsConflict escalationHaving disagreements intensify quickly instead of moving toward understanding or repair.Read about this pattern →Attachment Avoidance PatternsConflict shutdownGoing quiet, detached, or unavailable when emotional tension rises.Read about this pattern →Anxiety & Threat PatternsControl seekingTrying to feel safe by controlling outcomes, people, plans, or information.Read about this pattern →Rumination & Overthinking PatternsConversation replayMentally reviewing what was said, how it sounded, and what you should have said instead.Read about this pattern →Relationship Conflict PatternsCriticism loopsRepeatedly expressing dissatisfaction through blame or character judgments rather than clear requests.Read about this pattern →Attachment Avoidance PatternsDeactivating feelingsDisconnecting from attachment needs or emotions to regain a sense of control.Read about this pattern →Executive Function PatternsDeadline dependenceNeeding urgency, pressure, or consequences to activate focus and action.Read about this pattern →Avoidance & Escape PatternsDecision avoidanceDelaying or dodging choices because the responsibility or uncertainty feels overwhelming.Read about this pattern →Executive Function PatternsDecision paralysisGetting stuck trying to make the right choice and being unable to move forward.Read about this pattern →Attachment Avoidance PatternsDefensive indifferencePerforming detachment when you actually feel rejected, disappointed, or vulnerable.Read about this pattern →Relationship Conflict PatternsDefensivenessResponding to feedback or hurt as an attack that must be explained, rejected, or countered.Read about this pattern →Emotion Regulation PatternsDelayed processingNot feeling or understanding your emotions until much later.Read about this pattern →Executive Function PatternsDemand avoidanceResisting tasks when they feel imposed, pressured, or externally controlled.Read about this pattern →Self-Worth & Shame PatternsDesirability-based worthFeeling valuable only when you feel attractive, wanted, chosen, or sexually/romantically validated.Read about this pattern →Perfectionism & Performance PatternsDifficulty finishingStruggling to complete something because it never feels good enough.Read about this pattern →Emotion Regulation PatternsDifficulty self-soothingStruggling to calm your body or mind once you are activated.Read about this pattern →Attachment Anxiety PatternsDistance panicInterpreting someone’s need for space, distraction, or busyness as loss of interest.Read about this pattern →Attachment Avoidance PatternsDistance reflexCreating distance when intimacy, dependence, or emotional expectation increases.Read about this pattern →Avoidance & Escape PatternsDistraction numbingUsing scrolling, food, sleeping, working, entertainment, or substances to avoid feeling what is happening.Read about this pattern →Perfectionism & Performance PatternsEffort shameAvoiding visible effort because not succeeding would feel embarrassing or exposing.Read about this pattern →Emotion Regulation PatternsEmotion suppressionPushing feelings down instead of acknowledging or expressing them.Read about this pattern →Avoidance & Escape PatternsEmotional avoidanceAvoiding feelings rather than allowing yourself to experience and process them.Read about this pattern →People-Pleasing & Overfunctioning PatternsEmotional caretakingTaking responsibility for keeping other people calm, happy, reassured, or unburdened.Read about this pattern →Attachment Anxiety PatternsEmotional dependencyRelying heavily on another person’s attention or availability to feel emotionally stable.Read about this pattern →Emotion Regulation PatternsEmotional floodingBecoming so overwhelmed by emotion that it is hard to think clearly or respond intentionally.Read about this pattern →Cognitive Distortion PatternsEmotional reasoningTreating your emotional state as proof of what is objectively true.Read about this pattern →Burnout & Capacity PatternsEnergy miscalculationPlanning based on an ideal energy level rather than your actual capacity.Read about this pattern →Avoidance & Escape PatternsEscape fantasizingMentally retreating into fantasies of disappearing, starting over, quitting, or being rescued instead of engaging with the situation.Read about this pattern →Motivation & Agency PatternsFailure forecastingPredicting failure in advance and letting that prediction reduce effort or risk-taking.Read about this pattern →Anxiety & Threat PatternsFalse-alarm spiralingReacting to a normal or ambiguous signal as if it confirms a serious threat.Read about this pattern →Attachment Anxiety PatternsFear of abandonmentFeeling afraid that someone will leave, lose interest, or stop caring.Read about this pattern →Perfectionism & Performance PatternsFear of mistakesTreating errors as dangerous, humiliating, or revealing instead of normal and correctable.Read about this pattern →Avoidance & Escape PatternsFeedback avoidanceAvoiding critique, evaluation, or information that might challenge your self-image.Read about this pattern →Self-Worth & Shame PatternsFeeling behindInterpreting your timeline as proof that you are failing compared with where you “should” be.Read about this pattern →Cognitive Distortion PatternsFixed self-labelingTurning a behavior or mistake into a fixed negative identity.Read about this pattern →Motivation & Agency PatternsFixed self-storySeeing yourself through rigid identity labels that limit the possibility of change.Read about this pattern →Perfectionism & Performance PatternsFlaw fixationGetting stuck on small imperfections even when the overall work is good enough.Read about this pattern →Executive Function PatternsFollow-through drop-offStarting with intention or energy but losing momentum before completion.Read about this pattern →Anxiety & Threat PatternsFuture-trippingMentally living in feared future scenarios instead of responding to what is actually happening now.Read about this pattern →Burnout & Capacity PatternsIgnoring limitsPushing past signs of exhaustion, stress, or overload until your system forces a stop.Read about this pattern →Self-Worth & Shame PatternsImpostor feelingsDoubting your competence and attributing success to luck, timing, or other people’s misunderstanding.Read about this pattern →Emotion Regulation PatternsImpulsive copingActing quickly to relieve emotion, even when the action creates more problems later.Read about this pattern →Rumination & Overthinking PatternsIntellectualizingAttempting to solve an emotional state through logic instead of actually feeling or processing it.Read about this pattern →Motivation & Agency PatternsIntention-action gapKnowing what you want or plan to do but struggling to actually do it.Read about this pattern →Attachment Avoidance PatternsIntimacy claustrophobiaExperiencing closeness or expectation as pressure, loss of freedom, or engulfment.Read about this pattern →Anxiety & Threat PatternsIntolerance of uncertaintyStruggling to sit with not knowing and trying to eliminate ambiguity before moving forward.Read about this pattern →Emotion Regulation PatternsIrritability loopsGetting caught in repeated irritation, snapping, or agitation that often masks stress or hurt.Read about this pattern →Motivation & Agency PatternsIsolation inertiaStaying isolated because the longer you are disconnected, the harder it feels to reconnect.Read about this pattern →Attachment Anxiety PatternsJealousy monitoringTracking possible rivals, threats, or shifts in attention to protect against feeling replaced.Read about this pattern →Motivation & Agency PatternsLearned helplessnessBelieving your actions will not make a difference, even when they might.Read about this pattern →Emotion Regulation PatternsLow distress toleranceFeeling an urgent need to escape discomfort rather than sit with it.Read about this pattern →Rumination & Overthinking PatternsMental rehearsalPracticing future conversations or scenarios over and over in an attempt to feel prepared.Read about this pattern →Cognitive Distortion PatternsMind-readingAssuming you know what someone else thinks or feels without evidence.Read about this pattern →Attachment Avoidance PatternsMinimizing needsConvincing yourself you do not need support, care, comfort, or closeness.Read about this pattern →Cognitive Distortion PatternsMinimizing winsDismissing compliments, progress, or wins as luck, politeness, or not good enough.Read about this pattern →Rumination & Overthinking PatternsMistake reviewRepeatedly going over errors or regrets in a way that increases shame instead of learning.Read about this pattern →Emotion Regulation PatternsMood reactivityHaving your mood shift quickly and strongly in response to triggers, cues, or interactions.Read about this pattern →Motivation & Agency PatternsMotivation waitingDelaying action until you feel ready, inspired, confident, or energized.Read about this pattern →Cognitive Distortion PatternsNegative filteringFocusing on what went wrong while overlooking what went well.Read about this pattern →Burnout & Capacity PatternsOvercommitmentTaking on more than your time, energy, or emotional bandwidth can realistically support.Read about this pattern →People-Pleasing & Overfunctioning PatternsOverfunctioningTaking on more than your share to keep things running or prevent others from struggling.Read about this pattern →Cognitive Distortion PatternsOvergeneralizingTurning one event, mistake, or outcome into a broad rule about your life or identity.Read about this pattern →People-Pleasing & Overfunctioning PatternsOvergiving resentmentBecoming resentful after repeatedly giving more than you truly wanted or could afford.Read about this pattern →People-Pleasing & Overfunctioning PatternsOverhelpingOffering more support, advice, labor, or fixing than was asked for, to feel useful or secure.Read about this pattern →Perfectionism & Performance PatternsOverpreparationSpending more time preparing than a task needs, to avoid the possibility of failure or criticism.Read about this pattern →Emotion Regulation PatternsOverstimulation sensitivityBecoming emotionally or physically overwhelmed by too much noise, input, stimulation, demand, or social contact.Read about this pattern →Avoidance & Escape PatternsOverwhelm withdrawalPulling away from people, tasks, or routines when stress becomes too intense.Read about this pattern →Relationship Conflict PatternsPassive resentmentLetting anger or hurt leak out indirectly instead of addressing it openly.Read about this pattern →Cognitive Distortion PatternsPersonalizationAssuming something is your fault or about you when it may not be.Read about this pattern →Executive Function PatternsPlanning fallacyUnderestimating time, energy, steps, or obstacles when making plans.Read about this pattern →Emotion Regulation PatternsPost-trigger shameFeeling ashamed or self-critical after having a strong emotional reaction.Read about this pattern →Cognitive Distortion PatternsPremature certaintyDeciding what something means before you have enough information — “jumping to conclusions.”Read about this pattern →Burnout & Capacity PatternsPressure dependenceRelying on stress, urgency, or fear to function until it becomes unsustainable.Read about this pattern →Emotion Regulation PatternsPressure-cooker reactionsStaying quiet too long and then reacting with more intensity than intended.Read about this pattern →Executive Function PatternsPrioritization troubleStruggling to identify what matters most or what should happen first.Read about this pattern →Avoidance & Escape PatternsProcrastinationPutting off tasks to escape discomfort, pressure, boredom, fear, or self-evaluation.Read about this pattern →Self-Worth & Shame PatternsProductivity-based worthFeeling valuable only when you are useful, productive, impressive, or achieving.Read about this pattern →Attachment Anxiety PatternsProtest behaviorActing out, withdrawing, provoking, or escalating to get a reaction or proof of care.Read about this pattern →Relationship Conflict PatternsPursue–withdraw cycleOne person pushes for closeness or resolution while the other pulls away, reinforcing both reactions.Read about this pattern →Anxiety & Threat PatternsReassurance seekingLooking for repeated confirmation that things are okay, even though the relief fades quickly.Read about this pattern →Attachment Anxiety PatternsReconnection urgencyFeeling unable to settle until contact, repair, or closeness is restored.Read about this pattern →Burnout & Capacity PatternsRecovery avoidanceAvoiding the rest, support, or reset that would actually help you recover.Read about this pattern →Attachment Avoidance PatternsRelational dismissalTreating relational issues as exaggerated, unnecessary, or not worth discussing.Read about this pattern →Relationship Conflict PatternsRepair avoidanceAvoiding the vulnerable conversation needed to resolve conflict and reconnect.Read about this pattern →Rumination & Overthinking PatternsReplaying rejectionRepeatedly revisiting moments where you felt dismissed, excluded, criticized, or unwanted.Read about this pattern →Relationship Conflict PatternsResentment buildupLetting unspoken hurt, anger, or unmet needs accumulate until they shape how you see the other person.Read about this pattern →Avoidance & Escape PatternsResponsibility avoidanceAvoiding obligations because they feel emotionally loaded, demanding, or exposing.Read about this pattern →Burnout & Capacity PatternsRest guiltFeeling guilty, anxious, or undeserving when you slow down or recover.Read about this pattern →Relationship Conflict PatternsRevenge fantasizingMentally replaying scenarios where the other person finally understands, regrets, or is punished for how they hurt you.Read about this pattern →Burnout & Capacity PatternsRoutine collapseLosing basic routines when stress, depletion, or overwhelm builds.Read about this pattern →Rumination & Overthinking PatternsRuminationReplaying the same thoughts or events over and over without getting closer to clarity.Read about this pattern →Anxiety & Threat PatternsSafety behaviorsCreating backup plans, escape routes, or contingency plans to feel protected from possible threats.Read about this pattern →Anxiety & Threat PatternsSafety checkingRepeatedly checking, confirming, rereading, researching, or monitoring to reduce anxiety.Read about this pattern →Anxiety & Threat PatternsSafety planningCreating backup plans, escape routes, or contingency plans to feel protected from possible threats.Read about this pattern →Relationship Conflict PatternsScorekeepingTracking who has done more, cared more, sacrificed more, or failed more in a way that builds resentment.Read about this pattern →Self-Worth & Shame PatternsSelf-blameTaking on more responsibility than is yours for outcomes, conflicts, or other people’s feelings.Read about this pattern →Self-Worth & Shame PatternsSelf-criticismSpeaking to yourself with harshness, contempt, or punishment instead of accountability or care.Read about this pattern →Perfectionism & Performance PatternsSelf-handicappingCreating obstacles or excuses that protect you from being fully evaluated.Read about this pattern →People-Pleasing & Overfunctioning PatternsSelf-silencingHolding back your thoughts, feelings, or needs to avoid conflict, rejection, or disappointment.Read about this pattern →Perfectionism & Performance PatternsSelf-worth testingExperiencing ordinary tasks as proof of whether you are capable, smart, disciplined, or good enough.Read about this pattern →Executive Function PatternsSequencing difficultyHaving trouble breaking a task into ordered, manageable steps.Read about this pattern →Self-Worth & Shame PatternsShame spiralingMoving from “I did something wrong” into “something is wrong with me.”Read about this pattern →Cognitive Distortion PatternsShould-statementsJudging yourself through rigid rules about what you should feel, do, want, or be.Read about this pattern →Relationship Conflict PatternsSilent treatmentUsing silence, distance, or non-responsiveness to punish, control, or avoid emotional engagement.Read about this pattern →Burnout & Capacity PatternsSleep avoidanceDelaying sleep or rest even when tired because stopping, being alone with yourself, or facing tomorrow feels uncomfortable.Read about this pattern →Self-Worth & Shame PatternsSocial comparisonMeasuring your worth against other people in a way that makes you feel inferior or behind.Read about this pattern →Avoidance & Escape PatternsSocial withdrawalPulling away from people or social contact to avoid effort, vulnerability, shame, overwhelm, or possible rejection.Read about this pattern →Executive Function PatternsTask initiation difficultyStruggling with the first step of a task, especially when it is vague, boring, stressful, or multi-step.Read about this pattern →Executive Function PatternsTask paralysisFeeling stuck or unable to begin even when you know what needs to be done.Read about this pattern →Executive Function PatternsTask switching difficultyHaving trouble moving from one task, mode, or context into another.Read about this pattern →Attachment Anxiety PatternsText overanalysisReading deeply into response times, punctuation, tone, or small changes in communication.Read about this pattern →Anxiety & Threat PatternsThreat scanningConstantly looking for signs that something is wrong, unsafe, unstable, or about to change.Read about this pattern →Executive Function PatternsTime blindnessLosing track of time or misjudging how long things will take.Read about this pattern →Perfectionism & Performance PatternsUnrealistic standardsHolding yourself to expectations that are higher than what is reasonable or sustainable.Read about this pattern →Relationship Conflict PatternsUnspoken expectationsExpecting others to meet needs or standards that have not been clearly communicated.Read about this pattern →People-Pleasing & Overfunctioning PatternsUsefulness dependenceFeeling secure or valuable when others depend on you.Read about this pattern →Self-Worth & Shame PatternsValidation dependenceNeeding external approval to feel steady, worthy, or real.Read about this pattern →Attachment Avoidance PatternsVulnerability avoidanceAvoiding emotional openness because it feels exposing, unsafe, or burdensome.Read about this pattern →Relationship Conflict PatternsWin/lose arguingTreating conflict as something to win instead of something to understand or repair.Read about this pattern →People-Pleasing & Overfunctioning PatternsYes reflexAgreeing to things you do not actually want or cannot sustain.Read about this pattern →